my deserted blog

I realize ever since I got back from college, things have changed. For the good definitely but some instances that made me think, some that made me cry ( or rather more that made me cry, probably cos I am way too sensitive and cant take "no" for an answer ). We all like things to happen the way we want them to happen but we also have to realize that they don't some times. There are people who don't like to see you happy and wish things got screwed in your life or may be god just decides to give in a hard situation to handle and make him ask for things. I don't believe in idol worship but that doesn't mean I am an atheist, I feel very spiritual and its just that I don't realize it most of the times. I love writing my blog , no matter who reads or doesn't, I love writing but then since I am at home, things are supposed to be more easier and I was supposed to be updating more cos I like writing but it is the other way round. I always have my mother on my back to read what I write. Sometimes I wonder if she even wants to read my thoughts and my mind. I don't blame her, shes my mom after all. Its just that I haven't lived up to her expectations like any other daughter I know. But somehow I am better than a lot of people I know. I don't say I am the best but I am not in the bottom of the good daughters but definitely not at the top.

As for my life, I ll be going to america in less then a month and I am trying to prepare myself for that. I don't want things to change at least not to a drastic level where people go oh pesky you've changed so much. Even If they do I hope I change for the good and not for the bad. I need to restrict myself and update my blog more often once I leave to the us. I ll miss raven more than ever. Most relationships I've been hearing about have been breaking off. I know mine wont cos neither of us want to end this relationship. It is not some boyfriend girlfriend game that we are playing. I donno what love is but he makes me happy that is all that matters to me. I hope my parents understand this fact and not make things more difficult to me.

"NEW YORK" !!!

Wonder how different that is gonna be like. This just includes more strange and weird people into my life and I should begin to accept them whether good or bad after all I 've lived in Raichur. How bad could NY be. :)

And strangely I was crying at the beginning of this post listening to Nasha from shaitan and now all of a sudden after that one smiley that I just put up I feel a lot more better. My best companion as ever is definitely music. should be doing this more often rather than crying and losing my temper.

I 've been watching way too much gossip girl off late, that just made me end this post with xoxo , wonder what that even means. :P If you happen to read this post completely please do let me know what xoxo means :D Thank you for reading if at all you survived through the post.

Guess someones back in action (that's me, if u r wondering and I was talking about blogging, this rather seems like a long post, at least longer than my usual posts :) )

cheerrsssss :) :) :)